Bedbugs are back in America. Disgusting though they are, they may not be the grossest thing about this article.

The classic bedbug strain that all newly caught bugs are compared against is a colony originally from Fort Dix, N.J., that a researcher kept alive for 30 years by letting it feed on him.

Apparently, a scientist let bedbugs feed on him for thirty years. A day or two, ok, fine, but thirty years?! Other biologists, like Steven A. Kells, are not quite so giving of themselves. Kells feeds his bed bugs with expired blood-bank blood wrapped in parafilm.

Coby Schal of North Carolina State said he formerly used condoms filled with rabbit blood, but switched to parafilm because his condom budget raised eyebrows with university auditors.

I know one thing. I would love to have been a part of that particular conversation.

Apparently, it’s common practice for medical students to perform pelvic exams on anesthetized patients, without ever obtaining consent. A 2003 interview with Dr. Michael Greger has been republished, and talks in-depth about the practice. Here’s the topper:

Women can write on their bikini line, “I do not give consent for medical students to practice pelvic exams on me” in marker. Then as soon as the clothes come off or the robe is lifted and all the medical students are getting on their latex gloves they can see that message. And that will stop them.

The headline for the linked article reads “Fidel Castro claims Osama bin Laden is a US spy“. It’s all downhill from there.

In other vagina-related news, a rather obscene tree in Thailand has “predicted” a winning lottery number. According to the Phuket Gazette, villagers from the tree’s home used numerology to “find” the number 008 in the tree’s trunk, and bought lottery tickets based off this. It’s not clear if that’s the whole winning number, 0-0-8, or if they literally just used “8″ to somehow hit the jackpot. Either way, they won and they’re crediting the vagina tree.

It’s no Paul the Octopus, but that’s pretty good for a tree.

It can be difficult to ask your boss for a raise. If you’re a woman, Summer’s Eve is here to help, with some helpful advice. No wait, not helpful, the other thing…

Oh, right, right. “Truly bizarre”. Summer’s Even is here to help with some truly bizarre advice.

I only know enough about Jersey Shore to know I couldn’t care less about the show and its cast of Oompa-Loompas. It seems that the fashion world, however, is very attuned to it. It’s not for the reasons you might expect though.

Apparently, after one of the shows cast members Snooki was seen constant with a Coach bag, Coach sent her a free bag. It wasn’t one of their bags, however – it was a Gucci bag, one of Coach’s competitors.

Allegedly, the anxious folks at these various luxury houses are all aggressively gifting our gal Snookums with free bags. No surprise, right? But here’s the shocker: They are not sending her their own bags. They are sending her each other’s bags! Competitors’ bags!

If you’re so reviled that it actually nets you free stuff, does that count as a win?

This fascinating article from The Atlantic details how author Mitch Moxley became a rentable white guy in China.

“I call these things ‘White Guy in a Tie’ events,” a Canadian friend of a friend named Jake told me during the recruitment pitch he gave me in Beijing, where I live. “Basically, you put on a suit, shake some hands, and make some money. We’ll be in ‘quality control,’ but nobody’s gonna be doing any quality control. You in?”

I only wish the article were longer, because this whole idea is very interesting.

Having recently seen a Double-A baseball game, I was fascinated to read this (quite long) article on the realities of playing minor league ball. While big leaguers make a minimum of $400,000 a year, and generally much, much more, minor leaguers average between a few hundred and a few thousand dollars a month, for just five months of the year.

This can lead to all manner of difficulties for the men pursuing their dream of playing in the big leagues. In fact, the Double-A minimum salary is just $1700, just below the average monthly unemployment payout is $1703.20. Players would make slightly more if they simply didn’t work at all.

With this in mind, it’s not hard to see why my fellow Tufts alumnus Randy Newsom attempted to sell futures in himself. Unfortunately, that plan was shut down and subsequently quite watered down.

After acting on a tip reporting an outdoor marijuana grow-op, RCMP officers descended on the remote site, about 700 km southwest of Calgary, only to be greeted by up to 14 black bears that Sgt. Fred Mansveld is convinced were there to ward off pot bandits.

Apparently, the bears were quite docile, as seen in the ridiculous photos. Even armed officers should be a bit more frightened than this:

“Maybe they mixed some pot into the food — it’s possible it’s why they were so laid-back…they were just lolligagging around,” he said, adding the bears had made friends with a raccoon and pot bellied pig also found on the property.

Friends with a raccoon and pot-bellied pig, eh? It’s possible someone mixed something into your food too, Sgt. Fred Mansveld.

After a couple purchased a 200-year-old building in the Cape Cod town of Chatham several years ago, local zoning boards stopped them from making some minor changes they desired. When they learned that there are no local rules on paint color, however, the homeowners chose a distinctive look.

Painting your house like a can of 7-Up, out of spite? Yeah, I can get behind that.