…And when you're dry and ready, a scam I will…perpetrate.

Apparently, a number of customers in Canada have purchased iPads from legitimate retail stores like Best Buy, only to find that instead they've received a lump of clay shaped like an iPad. When Mark Sandhu and his wife opened their iPad box on Christmas Eve, they were left to utter a Charlie Brown-esqe "I got a rock". Ultimately though, it seems to have turned out alright.

Sandhu and his wife have received an apology from the company plus a full refund. They also received a new iPad 2 as compensation for their troubles.

Last week, an Italian cruise ship wrecked and ultimately sank after hitting a reef off the coast of Italy. At least eleven people perished in the disaster, but the captain didn't go down with his ship. Instead, he wound up in a lifeboat, and then safely on shore. His excuse?

“…I tripped and I ended up in one of the boats. That's how I found myself in the lifeboat.”

If you find the captain's story hard to believe, you're not alone. Even more unbelievable, however, is the ship's choice of music.

If you were curious why North Koreans were wailing and gnashing their teeth during the funeral for deceased dictator Kim Jong-Il, here's your answer.

Uber is a new company, combining elements of a private-car service and simple taxi cabs, in an effort to make it easier for folks to get where they're going. Part of their model, however, could use some fine-tuning.

The company implemented a New Year’s surcharge that stuck San Francisco-based Uber user Dan Darcy with a $63 bill for traveling 0.73 miles. (That’s a rate of $86.30 per mile.)

You could probably get someone to carry you on their back for that rate. Uber calls this "surge pricing", and it could be a logical way to lower demand. Uber's ham-fisted way of presenting the whole thing, however, may help them reduce bring demand down to zero.

The article also mentions that Coca-Cola once tested a vending machine that raised prices when it was hot out. Now that is evil.

Previously, I wrote about Twitter's Raison D'Etre. Sadly, the faux-Michael Jordan account is gone, but there are plenty of other great accounts. Most recently, this single-joke gem provided a good chuckle. The dear-god-I-hope-it's-automated account consists of nothing but replies to users who type "sneak peak", when they mean "sneak peek".

It's a simple but good joke, with an amusing name (and a great avatar to go with it). It gets even better when you check out @StealthMountain's favorites too, to see all manner of indignant replies from the grammatically challenged.

Following a long legal dispute, a black church in South Carolina has been declared the legal owner of a building which currently houses a store peddling Ku Klux Klan merchandise.

Kennedy and his church had ownership of the building transferred to them in 1997 after the previous owner, a Klansman, quarreled with his fellow Klan members, particularly the store proprietor. The Klansman gave the building to Kennedy's church after the two developed a "spiritual relationship," according to the judge in the case.

Awkward.